Why is the english language so, you know?

let's face it, english isn't the smartest language. there's no egg in eggplant. there's no ham in a hamburger and neither pine nor apple in pineapple. english muffins aren't from england. french fries aren't from france. if we examine the paradox of the language we find that quicksand slowly takes us under, boxing rings are square, and guinea pigs aren't from Guinea nor are they pigs. if writers write how come fingers don't fing? if the plural of tooth is teeth then how come the plural of booth isn't beeth? if teachers taught, don't preachers praught? if vegetarians eat vegetables then what do humanitarians eat?! when the stars are out they are visible but when the lights are out they're invisible. and why is it that when i wind up my watch it starts but when i wind up this observation it ends. just a random thought to make you smile and think